Father's Farewell

British Bank holidays are public holidays and have been recognized since 1871. The name Bank Holiday comes from the time when banks were shut and so no trading could take place.

I know that Rob, our Marketing Guru, along with Marie who assists with our buying and ensures that all our bills are paid on time, as well as Lisa, who organises so competently our equestrian department really believe that i was around at the first ever Bank Holiday, such ideas i assure them are completely without foundation, but i do recall the first time a man landed on the moon! Sadly though i am unable to recall when Everton last won the 1st division or Premier League Championship.

However you will be delighted to know that we, like the Windmill Theatre during the blitz of the Second World War (which they say was a bit raunchy side) never closed.

We never close either and our valued customers are able to order online 24/7.

We have just heard that one of our female members of staff will be taking up a vocation as a nurse in the New Year, so any of you guys reading this and need an operation, i suggest you postpone it until 2010.

I have enjoyed writing these blogs, but will be delighted when Dawn is back in work on Tuesday. To all of you out there who have sent me emails saying how boring and hopeless my blogs are, all i can say is that I'll contact you again when Dawn is next on holiday.

Fond Farewells
Father

Back by popular demand

Sarah (aka) Posh has still not delivered our eagerly anticipated future new employee, we wait hopefully each day but nature refuses to rush, meanwhile Beci (aka) Becks has her own very major problems (don't we all Becks)?

Posh and Becks are part of our very helpful Customer Services division ably supervised by Marsha and our resident canine friend, loved by all of us and known as Missy.

So what is the all consuming problem bothering Becks? I'll let you into a little secret, when she is not discussing customer requirements on the phone, she spends her time painting and manicuring her finger nails. They really are long and lovely, wait a moment though, the nail on the little finger on her right hand broke recently. Becks was traumatised and when Beck is traumatised we all suffer.

Marsha (mine's a half please) to the rescue, after much discussion it was problem solved and with some reluctance, Becks cut all her finger nails down to one size. Phew!!! Problem sorted now.

In the interim we have been sourcing a fantastic new range of baby travel systems, which will be available before Christmas, oops now I've let the cat out of the bag, Dawn will not be pleased, never mind, cant wait til she is back from hols, our Spiritual Guide Andrew has been filling in for her and was doing a great job until he sent Mrs Campbell a 87 year old widow, some football goal nets instead of an electric blanket. The good news is, as she now has her blanket she can keep warm while diving at the feet of on rushing forwards.

Warm regards
Father

Father has spoken

To regular readers of our blog, you will be disappointed to know that our own very special Dawn who writes the blogs is away on holiday in an exotic location. She refuses to tell us where she is going just in case we try to contact her during her well earned hols, so it is my pleasant job to be sub.

Our office is currently a hive of activity as we are preparing for you (our Important Customers) some fantastic, never to be repeated Bank Holiday bargains. These can only last as long as we have stock left, so see our site if you are going camping in the next few weeks before these great deals are all snapped up.

We are now sourcing some exciting new product ranges for Autumn and even for next Spring/Summer. I am forbidden by Dawn to say too much about these new ranges because she wants to tell you herself all the great news as it happens so please please keep watching the blog for all the latest info.

I'm sure we all wish Dawn and her family a fantastic holiday, oh and just in case you see an attractive blonde driving around in a red Ford Ka with a green letter P on a white background from and rear, please give her a wave cos it can only be our one and only, ever-so-special and talented Dawn.

The Challenge Continues . . .

I apologise that there haven't been any blog posts recently. Most of my time has been spent training up Andrew in the art of doing my work. I honestly thought there wouldn't be one today, but luckily I am just able to squeeze a small quickie in. I doubt there will be one on Friday though, as that is the day I go away and leave Andrew alone in the big wide world of downloads.

I thought I'd update you all on how the challenge of training the Spiritual Guide is progressing.

You can all sigh with relief. He is doing fine. I have every faith that he will be okay, and dispatch will run as smoothly as what it normally does . . . I'm not one to brag . . .

And despite all the distractions that are being thrown his way, things are still looking rosy.

I now know I can relax on that beach without a care in the world . . .

PS: I've just heard rumours that someone may throw a blog or two in during next week when I'm away. This should be quite interesting, and I'm sure I will be logging on at some point to have a nose . . .

D. Ilott

Cybercheckout

Gridstop Ltd

The Challenge . . .

I'm going away for a week in a weeks time (yep, soon there will be no blogs for an entire week) but because of this someone else has to do my job. My morning hours are usually filled with dispatch work - shipping all your orders out - and it is a very fiddly and very complicated process. You have to really get your head around what you are doing and concentrate, but because I've been doing this job now for nigh on five years, I can practically do it with my eyes closed.

However, because of the recent changes that have been made within Gridstop Ltd, no one else really knows how to do it properly. It leaves me with the predicament of what would happen should I not be here, and because of this someone else has to be trained.

Now, the only other person who could possibly do this is none other than our Spiritual Guide, Andrew (his own words not mine. He foolishly volunteered . . . )

What a Palaver!!!

Obviously the routine that I have fallen into works fine for me, but everyone is different, and what I find easy will just confuse someone else, ie Andrew. Theoretically though, once you see where you want to be, and can establish what needs to be done to get there, your own routine will just fall into place. You just need to get your head around what you are doing and stay on track. As long as you reach that final goal, everything will be fine.

So, with one week to go, the real question is, will Andrew become confident and know what he is doing, or will I just come back in two weeks time to a mess . . . ?

Hmmm . . . let the challenge begin . . .

D. Ilott

Cybercheckout

Gridstop Ltd

It's all going Gah-gah . . .

Soon we will be gaining a new member of staff. He will be short, tubby, he'll be very emotional, occasionally smelly, and when he's upset he will let everyone know about it! But he will be cute, adorable, and well worth putting up with!

Yes, our very own Sarah is about to go on maternity leave to have her George. After sitting in the customer services office for nigh on nine months, I'm pretty sure he knows the rules, and I can envisage him sitting at a desk with a headset on and answering calls in no time at all. I jest you not . . . ! Andrew - the Spiritual Guide, and someone who wanted so much to be a birthing partner - is making it his mission during the next few foreseeable months to ensure that his first words are "Hello, Cybercheckout . . . "

I'm not, and have never been, a kiddie person myself. I know it's the most natural thing in the world, and the most wonderful thing in the world to a lot of people, but to me it's wrong. It's just wrong! I can't even be anywhere near Sarah when George starts kicking. It makes me cringe, and I just have images of Alien, bursting forth from the stomach. I can't help it, I'm just weird!

I do, however, have my cat. She's like a child in herself. She constantly wants to be around me, gets miserable when we go out, smothers me when we get in, and she leaves me little presents from time to time - not including the tufts of fur that she leaves floating around like tumble weed. Yes, I'm very proud of my cat.

As for Sarah, I sure you'll all join me in wishing her the best of luck with little George. She'll make a wonderful mum, and I know both her and Dave will be the proudest, happiest parents ever - but then aren't they all?

We'll just try and keep Andrew away . . . away!

D. Ilott

Cybercheckout

Gridstop Ltd

Noob Reviews . . .

Browsing through our website, looking for ideas and inspiration for the blog, I stumbled across these. They're customer reviews on our products and service and can now be left and viewed. I personally have never read these before - but I've heard about them on numerous occasions - and so I thought I'd publish a few on here. They deserved to be aired . . .

. . . Thanks a lot for the fantastic shopping experience. Arrived lightning fast, execllent quality, top marks for all round excellent service . . . I will certainly buy again . . .

. . . Tipi is wicked and service even better. This company is one of the best I've dealt with on the internet, very big thanks . . .

. . . My girlfriend bought me one of these towels, and for a guy it is hard to get excited about towels, but once I had used it I could see what she was going on about, they are extremely soft and they get you dry much quicker. I would wholeheartedly recommend them . . .

. . . We used this tent for the Sonisphere festival last weekend. The colour coded poles were really helpful for two noob campers & we managed to set it up within about 20 mins. Kept us nice and dry all weekend, even after the heavy rain on Saturday afternoon. Very happy with the product . . .

After reading these, I've come to the conclusion that we must be doing something right, and I'm usually not one to blow my own trumpet . . . oh, but wait! You can do that for us!

http://http//www.cybercheckout.co.uk/p-529-trumpet-special-offer-free-pp-.aspx

PS: I've just been informed by a noob camper that I'm obviously not down with the kids, because I didn't know what `noob` meant. (new, beginner, newbie, ect . . . ) And, seeing as I'm sitting here contemplating getting excited by the thought of a bamboo towel, I think it's clear that I'm not . . .

D. Ilott

Cybercheckout

Gridstop Ltd

A Big Strong Sale! . . .

As soon as you click on to our website it becomes blatantly obvious that we have a sale!!! Sale! Sale! Sale!

The banner says it all really (only, it's not as blurred as the tiny image I've used here) which is good. It's bold, bright, and gives you a clear indication of the sort of items that are available at cut prices. It's right in front of everything and is sure to catch the eye and grab your attention. Even if you're only after a specific item, at least you know, at first glance, that we have a SALE! Then you might start umming and arrrhing, the clogs in the ol' head might start chinking away, and you may just decide to have a nose , see something you surprisingly like, and BUY!

Impulse. There's nothing quite like it!

We owe all this grand work and design to none other than our creative hero, Keiron. He done a wonderful job this morning in creating this banner. It does exactly as it says on the label, so to speak. He is a genius.

However, it was a good job that he finished it this morning. It may have been disastrous if not. He had his hair cut this afternoon you see. . . all those lovely long tresses that he had, that draped down and framed his constantly tired face, and those big bright eyes . . . and I was afraid that it was going to turn out like the story of Samson, the strongest man in the world. The instant his enemy cut off all his hair, his strength diminished, leaving him weak and feeble until it all grew back.

I'm kinda hoping that even though Keiron's hair has all gone, he will still be able to produce quality work at a high standard.

And to give you an idea of Keiron's transformation:


Keiron before . . .
. . . And Keiron after . . .

Looks just like our very own Samson . . .

D. Ilott
Cybercheckout
Gridstop Ltd

The 40 Year Revenge . . .

In last Friday's blog (31st July - the Greek Legend of Hotstones . . . ) I stated at the end that it was our Spiritual Guide's 40th Birthday. Yes, 40; 40 years old; the big 4-0!

He was most impresssed that I had mentioned this in celebration of his coming into the world - and if you can hear the sarcastic tone of the voice in my head, you might begin to comprehend just how impressed he was.

I may have exaggerated just slightly - but only slightly. He was actually 36 years old on Saturday, not 40. But we all celebrated like it was his 40th, and we even got a huge sheet and pinned it to the railing outside our offices stating `Happy 40th Birthday`. . .

Oh, how he loved us . . .

He still does, and believes that revenge is a dish best served cold. He's warned us all that he doesn't forget, and that our time will come. How exciting!

But what sort of punishment would best suit a minor crime such as this? I mean it's not like we advertised to the whole world that he was 4 years older than what he truly was . . . it's not like we published it in the local paper (which we were intending to but didn't want to pay the expense) . . . and it's not like we told him that he looks 40 - or even 140. We did none of those things. So is this a 36 year old mountain made from a 40 year old molehill, I ask myself?

Hmm....but I do believe he is the sort of person who won't forget this. It's just a good job my birthday is a long way off. He will have forgotten about it by then . . . after all, his mind isn't what it used to be . . .

Mwah ha ha haaaa . . . .

D. Ilott

Cybercheckout

Gridstop Ltd